Molue Experience

Someone once told me that you've not experienced Lagos is if you have not gone on a 'molue' drive. You do know the buses commonly called 'molue', the buses are bent to one side, their bodies are battered and rattered and they're more often than never, over-loaded.


Yes, i was priviledged to get into one. Its a long story. I followed my friend to Ojo on a beautiful Sunday morning. Being a family house, there was enough food and i'm ashamed to say it now but i binged, slept, ate again and ate some more. To my detriment.


I woke up at around 6pm, mumbled a few grateful 'thank you's' to my host and staggered on a very full tummy into the world.


Well to cut a long story short, there was no taxi in sight. It was late evening, i had to get home quick to avoid getting locked out and to also prepare for work the next day. Only then did i emerge out of my food induced dreamy world.


I started 'panicking'. I was chewing my nails. I cursed my self for allowing my greed to take full control of my thinking. I cursed my friend for having so much wonderful food to spare and i cursed the whole world for just being there.


My friend then suggested we use the big molue buses and before i could say 'no way dude', she had jumped (lagos style) into the nearest one which was moving of course. I had no choice but to stumble in after her (i almost lost my hair in the process).

There was no spare seat in the bus and no spare standing space for that matter. I had to hang unto the pole for dear life and pray that...just pray for a miracle, any miracle.

I was squeezed into a fat woman's underarm and ...oh dear!!! That is one experience i'm never going to go through again.

As for my friend? Thank God we're still friends.

True Love

Christmas and indeed the whole holiday season is a time of love, laughter, joy..., and all other mushy feelings. The truth is, christmas is not complete if we dont show some love to total strangers. Some wise fella (cant remember the name now) said that we can can only be truly happy if we make someone else happy (not entirely in those words).

So go out, spread some love. Visit the sick, the prisoners (and hope they dont attack you ;) (just kidding), orphans...

Start the new year by putting a smile on someone's face, you'll be surprised at how warm you'll feel, when a total stranger smiles appreciatively at you.

HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!

By Fire, By force

How long as it been? Three months...Wow!!!

I'm the world's greatest procrastinator, no doubt about that.

Well its that time of the month - Christmas, gifts, food.... This time i'm not going to be left out. I wont be celebrating the Sallah, obviously, but this christmas, BY FIRE BY FORCE, must be the best yet. I dont care if i have to stand on the streets of Lagos with a sign on my forehead. I'm going to make friends and have fun. With a capital F.

Ok. I have a plan though. I just dont know what it is now. Wish me luck!!!

Dont mind me (Thoughts from a sad mind)

...All of the moments are already there
Try to go back and make them last
...
that's u baby, this is me baby
we are, we are, we are we areeeeee, we arrrrrrrrrrrrrrree
weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee in love...

Words from Nelly Furtado's 'Try'
What if we try and try and try till our backs break from trying, its not so much the idea of trying, its the thought of not getting it (whatever we're supposed to be trying to get).

Is it only me or do you sometimes feel like giving it all up. I mean its ok to believe that you can be all you ever wanted to be, but...

I know i'm blabbing, its just one of those days when i cant get my thoughts together, when i think of everything and nothing at all.

i wish i was an angel, i would work particularly hard to make a lot of good people happy u know.
I know a lot of people that deserve to be happy.

While we're at it, what's happy? When do you become happy?

You know what i think? I think if we were very happy we'd be bored stiff. Imagine smiling all through and thinking 'i'm happy, there's nothing wrong with me, i'm happy, i'm happy...'

f*** that. you have to be sad to know what it is to be happy.

I'm an expert in that (being sad). Today alone i've succeeded in making myself the most miserable person in the world (a beautiful miserable person).

Alright alright, like mushu would say 'hold on to ur ectoplasms now'. I'm tired of being sad so i'm going in 'Pursuit of happyness', the thing is do i go left or right?

Voice for Rent - My crazy moments

Once a guy who was interested in me told me i had a nice voice and i should try singing. I dont need to tell you that i rushed off to do some serious practicing using my phone to record the 'beginnings/makings of a nigerian beyonce'. The song? Dido's 'life for rent'. I must say after i heard myself, i never spoke to the guy again.

Another time, i was adviced by my classmates to run for the office of vice-president of the department, and then i saw my self as the Rice of Nigeria. i was supposed to give a speech in front of the whole class. The morning i was supposed to give a speech, i woke up feeling sick, my friends tried to convince me that i would do well and i'm a 'natural'.... I actually prayed to have a fatal accident on my way to school, when that didnt work, i prayed that war would break out in the country. Needless to say, none of my evil prayers were answered and i found my self in front of the whole class and something happened, i literaly watched my voice run (on two legs) out the door. That was the end of my political career.

And YET another time, my friend and i convinced ourselves, after listening to a number of motivational tapes and reading a couple of books, that we could 'be whatever we wanted to be if only we made the move'. We decided to pool our resources together, and invest in barfs (clothing), we became sales girls. Each time i wanted to sleep or just have some play time, she'd scream 'eat that frog'. The frog being procrastination. Poor frog, or maybe poor procrastination. Imagine being a frog. 4 weeks and a lot of digested frogs later, we were very broke and in serious debt. Dont ask what we did to the motivational tapes and books.

Another time, i ...

Ahhhh, i've had my moments.

Cold war

This morning i had a fight with Dami. It was long overdue. Dont get me wrong, it wasnt a fist fight, more like a shouting competition.

It really isnt easy staying with a friend in a small room and sharing the same bed and sharing the same space, infact the only thing we dont share is clothes and food. The point is, sharing a very small space breeds fights. The fight was inevitable, it had been in the air for days.

I came home from work on Monday and she was acting cold, so i decided to just ignore her and thus began our own cold war.

We didnt say a word to each other that night and Dami slept on the floor to avoid sleeping in the same bed with me. At first it was funny seeing her curled up on the cold floor with the ac on and her towel over her body trying very hard to keep warm and tying her tops to her feet to keep warm.
The second day it wasnt so funny, i started feeling like the cold witch of the very cold north and angry that she should be acting like i was the step mom and she was cinderdami. I made up my mind to do something about it the next day.

When i woke up today, i thought of a million ways to approach Dami. Should i slap her around and make her see sense or should i talk to her friendo a friendo or should i just ignore her AGAIN
Then i heard a quiet voice telling me to approach her friendo a friendo, but a louder voice suggested (rather loudly of course) that i pick the first option and just bring down the house.

Well i went for that, i'm sorry and ashamed to say so now, but i brought down the house and the trees around it for good measure.
We both shouted ourselves hoarse and i left for work in a huff and a puff, lucky i didnt blow myself away.
Well now i'm in the office and i cant get any work done. I feel so ashamed of myself and words that i may have spoken and i dont know how to make amends for fear of rejection.

How did America and Russia get over it?

Lucky Sleeping Beauty

I woke up this morning to the sound of rain, i felt the need to sleep the world away. Who knows, the dark days might just fly by while i'm sleeping. Sleeping beauty doesnt know how lucky she got it, she just slept and woke up, got married to the most desirable man of the day and lived happily ever after. I mean the lass skipped boarding school and the punishments, monthly cramps, broken hearts, stupid mistakes, failed exams, jamb and waec, sorting lecturers and working your heart out to make ends meet. I think she should be called 'lucky sleeping beauty'.

I waited a little bit for the rain to ease up and put my best leg forward, the sky opened up again showering me with 'blessings'. Today was definitely not my good day.

Things didnt get any better in the office, nope, it got... well it wasnt any better. Everybody was moody, the whole place was cold and tempers were short. I think they must have been thinking the same thing, 'lucky sleeping beauty'.

When it was time for break, i prayed for a silver lining in my very grey sky, Ola whom i shared office space with was sobbing, she just got some news that her mum who was sick was getting worse, i tried to comfort her and my phone rang, it was my close friend Dami, she called to tell me another friend Ene was getting married to a rich hunk and then my whole day just got worse.

Dont get me wrong, i'm not jealous or anything, well maybe a little envious. Ene and i were roomates in school. We'd sit and talk for hours about the kind of guys we would marry, we shared horror stories about our boyfriends and heartbreaks and.... Now she's getting married BEFORE me and to the KIND OF GUY we'd always dreamt of. My mom is going to have 'that talk' with me again, i just know it. We have the talk anytime a friend of mine is getting married, she keeps reminding me that i'm not getting any younger and blah blah ....
Exactly 6-7 hours after that sort of talk, i always avoid people and just get depressed and feel so sorry for myself.

The day's not ended yet, i'm still waiting for that silver lining.